Edwin Testimony (Cont…)

My Doubts & Reflections

It’s was Good Friday. We started the retreat with fasting. It turned out to be a Q & A session where I was raising most of the questions. A few of them are listed below.

  1. †What is the need for Jesusí crucifixion?†
  2. Why God wanted His own son to be crucified, so that He can wash away our sins? Can’t he just write it off?†
  3. How the death of Jesus cleanses me?†
  4. Why should we eat the body of Christ and drink His blood to†savor†his closeness? Arenít we barbaric enough to do it?†
  5. Who is Holy Spirit and what does He do? Do I have Him? Do I need Him? Why should I?†

These are the few I can think of.

Our discussion went well passed midnight. The Lord slowly and patiently started to clarify my doubts. I need to admit that it was the Holy Spirit which was dwelling among us was able to answer all those questions. I learned that early morning hours were a time of grace.
Sugin, who was attending retreat along with me, shared his testimony on how God saved his life and how He relieved him from the clutches of evil. When he finished his testimony, I felt as if a black feather hit my face. I didnít know what it was. I donít know what it means or signify. Usually, I dismiss these sorts of feelings. However, on that particular night, I said to the people around me about what I felt.
The time was well passed midnight. When we were praying, I was informed that God wanted to talk to me. I was confused. How can God talk to people? Will it happen even in 21st century? After a short prayer, I opened up the Bible. Dr.Clington was sitting opposite to me and by any means; he can’t make out which page I was in. He asked to look at the left page, second column and asked me to start reading from the 10th verse from the top. In this fashion, I got four such verses that night.

  1. Jesus healing a blind man who sat near the pool for 38 years. (John 5: 5-9)
  2. How god brought the people from Egypt and how He protected them in both day and night (Exodus 13: 21-22)
  3. The next one was about starting things well on time rather than postponing it (Colossians 3:23)
  4. Parable of seeds (Mathew 13:1-9)

The act of opening the Bible and hitting a random line could be disastrous. You can easily misinterpret. However, I have to agree that all those verses were well connected and too hard to deny it as coincidental. It started of with Jesus approaching the person who is in need. The son of God chose to come down to help the person. The second verse describes how lovable and caring God He is, when he protected the Israelites day and night in wilderness. The next verse speaks about procrastination and asks me to give a commitment to the Lord. The last verse makes me to question what sort of land am I? Would the seed in me reap the harvest?

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